From Timsomor:
This years first relationship topic is one I read and saw how some of us may really see each other. To say it's supported by facts, just depends on what side you are on. Anyhow, read we need to do more of it.
Taken from: http://www.tiredblackman.com
This shortage of good black men epidemic is all over the mass media, all of these showcases highlighting statistics about black men being incarcerated, uneducated, dating interracially or being a homosexual.There is a gender imbalance in America in general, there is seven million more white women then white men; and it is approximately one point eight million more black women then black men. I wonder why we never hear any white women saying there aren't any "good white men"? Despite the fact that the white gender imbalance favors white men by many millions more, white women are not making the same complaints as black women.
Black women are always on television talking about how they "can't find a black man that's on their level", there is all this talk about good black men; but we never clarify what the good black man is. What is considered good to one woman might not be good to another woman. Good or desirable is relative, it varies from person to person.
Isn't amazing how so many black women behave as if they all have the same standards and preferences? What most black people don't realize, is that this propaganda has been around since the sixties. It's hard to ignore the black matriarchy accusations when the similarities between this racist divide and conquer tactic and the shortage of good black men rhetoric are extremely disturbing. I have gathered some quotes from the Moynihan Report, that will make the comparison I'm making easier to grasp.
" According to Michelle Wallace, Daniel Patrick Moynihan used statistics from the United States Department of Labor describe a "Black Matriarchy", Wallace writes: "Although no one wold admit it, Moynihan had managed to provide authoritative support for something a lot of black men wanted to believe anyway: that the black woman had substantial advantages over the black man educationally, financially and in employment”
He therefore generated a reaction that facilitated black men to blame matriarchy for the loss of male power within the family setting. Moynihan also theorized a relationship between “the professional and educational advancement of black women to the high juvenile delinquency levels, high crime levels, poor educational levels for black males”. These illusionary advantages worked to contain this oppressed social class.
In actuality black women had the lowest earning power, held the lowliest positions within organizations and corporations, and often required more education to obtain these positions then men."
This report was written in 1965, when black women were at the bottom of the economic ladder; but contrary to popular opinion black women are still at the bottom of the economic forty-six years later. Today black women are seventy-one percent of black graduate students, but black men are still making more money annually with less formal education than black women. The same is true for white americans too, white women are earning more college degrees than white men, but they have yet to reach parity with them. Apparently the financial incentive women recieve for their superior credentials, are far from rewarding and actually quite insulting.
The fact that so many women choose to work in the pink collar professions such as nursing, social work, and elementary education doesn't help because the salaries of these professions are sometimes less than what
men can make in an average blue collar job. The statistics contradict the claims being made by so many black women, yes they do have more college degrees but in the financial sense there are plenty of black men on their level. Please feel free to look up the statistics on annual earnings for men and women by race, and you will see that white and black men are still earning more annually. We all know black women are taught by their mothers to be hypergamous- to marry up. Is marrying up about salary or education level?
It seems like professional black women are trying to find black men that are white collar like themselves; but the problem is that white collar professions are inherently feminine. Blue collar work has always been viewed as the work of "real men", sitting at a desk is for the sissies and prettyboys. The chauvinistic practice of calling intelligent guys nerds and geeks is evidence that women love men that have more money than them, but women obviously don't like guys that are smarter than them. Because men are bigger and stronger, women insist on having the psychological advantage. If there is anything women don't want to feel that is powerless, to feel that they are not in control. Intelligent guys are viewed as a threat for some odd reason, knowledge is one type of power women don't want men to have over them.
Some black women claim they want a man to " put them in check", but as soon as a man does it, they emasculate him for doing it. Apparently putting someone in check is the domain of women, and any man that attempts to do so will be told he is bitching and complaining. What black men have to understand is that a complaint is actually a demand or request, this is why some women resort to this type of emotional blackmail when a man finally does what they claim to want " express what he really feels to her". There are ways to communicate what you feel to a woman in a rational and masculine way, but expressing feelings is also associated with femininity. Going into a violent rage instead of communicating with a woman will only lead to more emasculation.
The black sociologist Nathan Hare in his work on the black middle class "Black Anglo-Saxons" said with stunning accuracy " Every intellectual advance comes with a loss in sexual attractiveness." When Hare made this statement, it was pretty much androgynous, but this unfortunately reality applies to men moreso than it does to women. The female nerd is just like the lone black couple at an exclusive white country club, meaning the female nerd is trying to fit in. Being a nerd or a geek is inherently masculine, you don't have wear glasses, or be skinny and frail to be at the recieving end of this insult. You can be a decent looking guy and still be called a nerd or a geek.
The essence of the nerd is his being socially awkward, he is too socially awkward to get a lady. Nerds are also very intelligent, but I already explained with great detail that some young women do not tolerate guys that are smarter than them. Brutes and meatheads appeal to the primitive instincts of young women, this creates an incentive for males to devalue learning. This is a paradox because, education is the only realistic means young men have to earn any money, all young men are not gonna be the next Terrell Owens or the next Jay-Z.
To hear young black women say there is a shortage of good black men, means that there isn't enough of these millionaire studs that we call athletes and rappers. The athletes and rappers are ideal because they have tons of money and they appeal to the primitive instincts. Young men aspire to be like the guys that get the most ladies and have the most material possesions, in this society that means rappers, athletes, as well as drug dealers. Young men are deciding not to pursue higher education, because of the stigmas attached to being a white collar black male (a sellout ). When professional black women say they want a black man on their level, are they saying they want white collar guys?
If they're not, all of this not on my level talk is very condescending, because statistics show that black men are earning more annually without the college degrees. This anti-intellectual machismo is the reason why so many young men do not value learning, some young women will admit that they have internalized this machismo, but they still can't figure out why black men don't have as much formal education as they do. Some young black women eagerly admit that they don't like the assimilated Wayne Brady types, but these are usually the brothers that are on their level when it comes to education.
Young black men know that the Wayne Brady types don't get the most attention from young ladies, so they decide not to be like the middle class black men; even if they have to sacrifice their educations. These assimilated brothers are a minority for a reason, and if a black man that has a degree is what black women think a good black man on their level is they might want to give the guy assimilated brothers a chance, because a lot of them usually end up dating outside the race. The gender ratio can't be changed, but what we believe is authentic black masculinity can and must be changed. There will be a shortage of good black men until young black men start making wiser decisions.
Corny Brother
Other Relationship Post on Debates that matter:
African women White Men, "Looking For A Way Out?"
What happened to the Nice Guys?
Why men should NOT be Nice/Good Guys.
This years first relationship topic is one I read and saw how some of us may really see each other. To say it's supported by facts, just depends on what side you are on. Anyhow, read we need to do more of it.
Taken from: http://www.tiredblackman.com
This shortage of good black men epidemic is all over the mass media, all of these showcases highlighting statistics about black men being incarcerated, uneducated, dating interracially or being a homosexual.There is a gender imbalance in America in general, there is seven million more white women then white men; and it is approximately one point eight million more black women then black men. I wonder why we never hear any white women saying there aren't any "good white men"? Despite the fact that the white gender imbalance favors white men by many millions more, white women are not making the same complaints as black women.
Black women are always on television talking about how they "can't find a black man that's on their level", there is all this talk about good black men; but we never clarify what the good black man is. What is considered good to one woman might not be good to another woman. Good or desirable is relative, it varies from person to person.
Isn't amazing how so many black women behave as if they all have the same standards and preferences? What most black people don't realize, is that this propaganda has been around since the sixties. It's hard to ignore the black matriarchy accusations when the similarities between this racist divide and conquer tactic and the shortage of good black men rhetoric are extremely disturbing. I have gathered some quotes from the Moynihan Report, that will make the comparison I'm making easier to grasp.
" According to Michelle Wallace, Daniel Patrick Moynihan used statistics from the United States Department of Labor describe a "Black Matriarchy", Wallace writes: "Although no one wold admit it, Moynihan had managed to provide authoritative support for something a lot of black men wanted to believe anyway: that the black woman had substantial advantages over the black man educationally, financially and in employment”
He therefore generated a reaction that facilitated black men to blame matriarchy for the loss of male power within the family setting. Moynihan also theorized a relationship between “the professional and educational advancement of black women to the high juvenile delinquency levels, high crime levels, poor educational levels for black males”. These illusionary advantages worked to contain this oppressed social class.
In actuality black women had the lowest earning power, held the lowliest positions within organizations and corporations, and often required more education to obtain these positions then men."
This report was written in 1965, when black women were at the bottom of the economic ladder; but contrary to popular opinion black women are still at the bottom of the economic forty-six years later. Today black women are seventy-one percent of black graduate students, but black men are still making more money annually with less formal education than black women. The same is true for white americans too, white women are earning more college degrees than white men, but they have yet to reach parity with them. Apparently the financial incentive women recieve for their superior credentials, are far from rewarding and actually quite insulting.
The fact that so many women choose to work in the pink collar professions such as nursing, social work, and elementary education doesn't help because the salaries of these professions are sometimes less than what
men can make in an average blue collar job. The statistics contradict the claims being made by so many black women, yes they do have more college degrees but in the financial sense there are plenty of black men on their level. Please feel free to look up the statistics on annual earnings for men and women by race, and you will see that white and black men are still earning more annually. We all know black women are taught by their mothers to be hypergamous- to marry up. Is marrying up about salary or education level?
It seems like professional black women are trying to find black men that are white collar like themselves; but the problem is that white collar professions are inherently feminine. Blue collar work has always been viewed as the work of "real men", sitting at a desk is for the sissies and prettyboys. The chauvinistic practice of calling intelligent guys nerds and geeks is evidence that women love men that have more money than them, but women obviously don't like guys that are smarter than them. Because men are bigger and stronger, women insist on having the psychological advantage. If there is anything women don't want to feel that is powerless, to feel that they are not in control. Intelligent guys are viewed as a threat for some odd reason, knowledge is one type of power women don't want men to have over them.
Some black women claim they want a man to " put them in check", but as soon as a man does it, they emasculate him for doing it. Apparently putting someone in check is the domain of women, and any man that attempts to do so will be told he is bitching and complaining. What black men have to understand is that a complaint is actually a demand or request, this is why some women resort to this type of emotional blackmail when a man finally does what they claim to want " express what he really feels to her". There are ways to communicate what you feel to a woman in a rational and masculine way, but expressing feelings is also associated with femininity. Going into a violent rage instead of communicating with a woman will only lead to more emasculation.
The black sociologist Nathan Hare in his work on the black middle class "Black Anglo-Saxons" said with stunning accuracy " Every intellectual advance comes with a loss in sexual attractiveness." When Hare made this statement, it was pretty much androgynous, but this unfortunately reality applies to men moreso than it does to women. The female nerd is just like the lone black couple at an exclusive white country club, meaning the female nerd is trying to fit in. Being a nerd or a geek is inherently masculine, you don't have wear glasses, or be skinny and frail to be at the recieving end of this insult. You can be a decent looking guy and still be called a nerd or a geek.
The essence of the nerd is his being socially awkward, he is too socially awkward to get a lady. Nerds are also very intelligent, but I already explained with great detail that some young women do not tolerate guys that are smarter than them. Brutes and meatheads appeal to the primitive instincts of young women, this creates an incentive for males to devalue learning. This is a paradox because, education is the only realistic means young men have to earn any money, all young men are not gonna be the next Terrell Owens or the next Jay-Z.
To hear young black women say there is a shortage of good black men, means that there isn't enough of these millionaire studs that we call athletes and rappers. The athletes and rappers are ideal because they have tons of money and they appeal to the primitive instincts. Young men aspire to be like the guys that get the most ladies and have the most material possesions, in this society that means rappers, athletes, as well as drug dealers. Young men are deciding not to pursue higher education, because of the stigmas attached to being a white collar black male (a sellout ). When professional black women say they want a black man on their level, are they saying they want white collar guys?
If they're not, all of this not on my level talk is very condescending, because statistics show that black men are earning more annually without the college degrees. This anti-intellectual machismo is the reason why so many young men do not value learning, some young women will admit that they have internalized this machismo, but they still can't figure out why black men don't have as much formal education as they do. Some young black women eagerly admit that they don't like the assimilated Wayne Brady types, but these are usually the brothers that are on their level when it comes to education.
Young black men know that the Wayne Brady types don't get the most attention from young ladies, so they decide not to be like the middle class black men; even if they have to sacrifice their educations. These assimilated brothers are a minority for a reason, and if a black man that has a degree is what black women think a good black man on their level is they might want to give the guy assimilated brothers a chance, because a lot of them usually end up dating outside the race. The gender ratio can't be changed, but what we believe is authentic black masculinity can and must be changed. There will be a shortage of good black men until young black men start making wiser decisions.
Corny Brother
Other Relationship Post on Debates that matter:
African women White Men, "Looking For A Way Out?"
What happened to the Nice Guys?
Why men should NOT be Nice/Good Guys.
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